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Please provide final feedback to the creators of this submission below:​

  • What did you like or love about this submission?

  • What did you find confusing or unclear?

  • What suggestions do you have to make it stronger?

Duane

Loved your story telling style. I thought it was going to be the Faust spline, sell your soul to the devil for the championship belt, or the 7th Seal, challenge Death to save the loved ones plot. Either one would’ve made this an excellent story. Very good storyreel anyway!

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Gabriel

Amazing job!! This is the best sound design I've seen so far! You've managed to really punctuate the gruesomeness and violence of Lui's fights while also making his inner demons terrifying! I also love your storyboarding and editing, you make incredibly interesting transitions between locations and past and present. Your story is also very moving, Luis character being pulled between this dutiful violence and his role in his family is an extremely interesting conflict, his fight with his inner demons is also interesting but it was unclear to me exactly his father's death led him to fighting. Bridging this gap by showing a little bit more of Luis' past and how he came to fighting, it being a direct result of his father's death and social condition would make the conflict of your story even stronger and also add much more depth to the scenes with the inner demons. An idea would also be for the demons to sort of fight with or control Luis at some points , showing that when he chooses brutality it's actually his trauma taking over and not him. An amazing story that truly uses all the animation offers, I would love to see it fully developed into a short film!

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Emmanuel

I made this film with Katie G.

I definitely think the scenes wirh Young Luis can be portrayed in a clearer way. From an outside perspective it can be hard to understand that violence is what plagues Luis. I also think the dialogue could've had some editing and revision.

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Emmanuel

Also the transfer from shame to anger in the first kitchen scene dont fully make sense and I think we could’ve written that/portrayed that better.

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The Story of Luis

Warning: Depictions of violence

What if a boxer had to fight his inner demon each time he fought

Special thanks to my beautiful partner and gf Katie Gibbons for doing all the illustrations and providing her voice.

Thanks to my friends and family for the various voices

Special Thanks:

Team:
Squinch Creative

Emmanuel, Katie

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