Dan

Nice and cohesive.

I was confused a little bit on what she was up against. She had a falling out with her former partner, then went back to rekindle what she had before (her music passion) and the other patron playing with her helped to reignite. But I'm confused maybe about why she's in that bar if it doesn't seem to help her find what she's looking for. Maybe she goes else where for inspiration first, then ultimately to the bar?
It has a clear path, just needs to be tighten up about 2/3 through, that's where it got a little muddy.

Christina

Wow!!! What awesome artwork. I love the world you built as a cool combo of 2D and 3D graphics; it's unique and believable. I also love the abstract ways you integrate the sensation of loving music with the "boca" lights and music notes in the beginning and the sensation of losing that passion with the empty, expansive staircase scene. The gluten free beer joke make me laugh! The way you edited certain moments in time with the music beats felt like a music video and that seems like the perfect choice for this story! So much good music in tucked in here, too; that'll be really cool when those musical transitions get fully fleshed out. Details of the visual story are a little bit unclear to me in the middle; I can't quite tell how many times Aria leaves the bar and returns to it, and why she does so. To make act II stronger, perhaps she could only go in and out of the bar one time -- really emphasizing that cool, isolated staircase moment by using it less often -- so that we see her whole struggle and realization in one location.

Emmanuel

I love the music and think the struggle of a person with a passion is great.

I was confused on her motivations and her challenges. For example, when she is playing keyboard is she competing against stripes dude? Im jot entirely sure whats going on. Also when she first enters the bar, does she expect music to be playing and she’s disappointed that there is no music? Why is there music outside but not outside? How does she fail at first performing in the bar but succeed later?
Overall why does she do better and ultimately achieve her dreams? Is it because she was resilient?
I suggest focusing on visually developing your characters to portray their arc. Great music and voice!

Jonah

A lot of nice stuff here. Im a little confused on the story, this is how I understand it; Its of a famous musician that wants to play songs that she enjoys, but the producer wants her to play the stuff that is popular. She finds a bar that she cant get out of, until she plays a pop song or she figured out a new tune that the producer likes in the end? But i loved some of the emotion some of these frames provided. Nice job!